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Her extensive vocabulary was more than highly proficient at knowing more curse words than most people learned in a lifetime. She believed in overcooking everything until it chewed like rubber so you would never get sick because all germs would be nuked.Freezing germs also worked, so by Friday our school sandwiches were hard and chewy, but totally germ free. You would pretend to cough, spit the food into it and thus was born the Stocks diet.He traveled where he wanted to travel, laughed inappropriately at every chance, learned what he wanted to learn, fix what he wanted to fix and loved who he wanted to love.” Of course he quickly follows that up by saying that “cremation will take place at the family’s convenience, and his ashes will be kept around as long as they match the décor” and that “anyone wearing black will not be allowed at the memorial service.His funny obituary will have you smiling the whole way through and wishing that you had been fortunate enough to meet him.Every sentence contains a witty and sarcastic comments.From dubbing himself “the favourite child” to listing off his regrets which include: “eating a rotisserie hot dog from a convenience store in the summer of 2002, and not training his faithful dog Rita to detect cancer, and that no video evidence exists of his prowess on the soccer field or in the bedroom.” James throws a bit of seriousness into his obituary, writing that: “Although a less than average life span, Jim did not live an average life.He wrote “she left behind a hell of a lot of stuff” for her daughter and sons who have no idea what to do with it.” He then rhymes off a list instructing anyone looking for “2 extremely large TV’s from the 90s,” “a large ceramic stork (we think) umbrella/cane stand,” “a (slightly used) toaster oven,” or “100 tools that we aren’t sure what they’re used for” to “wait the appropriate amount of time and get in touch.” He then adds, “tomorrow would be fine.” The obituary is full of humorous anecdotes about his Mom, from jokes about her potty mouth, to her questionable skills in the kitchen, as well as her knack for telling it like it is.He wrote, “She liked you or she didn’t, it was black or white.
Aaron was clearly a man who loved to make people laugh and smile, even when we was no longer with us.
Everyone told me it would happen one day but that’s simply not something I wanted to hear, much less experience. Well, I remember Mother wearing an apron; I remember Daddy calling Square Dances; I remember my older sister pushing me off my tricycle (on the cinder driveway); I remember my younger sister sleep walking out of the house.
Sydney’s “one more, no more” when she asked for a cookie; Jake saying he was “sick as a cat” when I’d said that someone else was sick as a dog; and Emma cutting her beautiful long hair and then proceeding to shave off one of her eyebrows … William Ziegler passed away on July 29, 2016 at the age of 69 “to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election,” according to the obituary written by Ziegler’s four children.
All jokes aside, the obituary ends with a heartfelt, “He will be greatly missed.” Full Obituary William volunteered for service in the United States Navy at the ripe old age of 17 and immediately realized he didn’t much enjoy being bossed around. Before his discharge, however, the government exchanged numerous ribbons and medals for various honorable acts.
Upon his return to the City of New Orleans in 1971, thinking it best to keep an eye on him, government officials hired William as a fireman.
As her children we are still trying to figure out which one it was for us (we know she loved us).” When asked what his mother would have thought about the obituary, Sandy told “She probably would have laughed her head off … He also added that if he could tell his Mom anything now he would say, “I know you wanted everything private, but sorry, Mom, I wanted you to be recognized for what you were because you were great.” “Pat Stocks, 94, passed away peacefully at her home in bed July 1, 2015.